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Cop & Cross Library
In our Cop & Cross Library, there are other books by Dr Willard you can view.
More Resources To Help In The Fight Against Porn
SOMEBODY'S DAUGHTER is a great resource for those battling porn addiction and seeking freedom.
Watch the video below. PURE LIFE MINISTRIES
Pure Life Ministries exists to serve Christian individuals and organizations dealing with sexual sin throughout the world by providing biblically based counseling, teaching resources, and a public speaking ministry with the goal of leading Christians to victory over sexual sin through a deeper life in God. You can watch the video below to learn more about Pure Life Ministries. They also have a live-in program.
Steve Gallagher is the founder of Pure Life. Steve speaks across the country. CLICK HERE to see his schedule. Or CLICK HERE to learn about their annual conference in April, 2012.
COVENANT EYES
COVENANT EYES has a great reputation for helping those who struggle against online porn. Watch the video below and visit their site.
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The pornographic "I" is the intent and decision to use sexual sensuality as a major source of gratification. Often this is supported by the view of oneself as deprived or hopelessly burdened. In fact, it is rooted in a Vision of God and of God’s world as a place of bitter disappointment where humans must "go for" what is available and somehow endure the rest. Thus the wrong vision of God lies at the foundation of pornographic practice. Needless to say, a right view of God and God’s world would of itself break the grip of a life of sexual sensuality. The work to be done here should be obvious: the transforming of the mind by the truth about God and his world. But one also has to come to grips with the fact that they do intend and decide to use pornography (or food, violence, whatever). Then the intention and decision not to use it must be formed. That will not be possible until the Vision element is transformed along the lines suggested. But then the correct intention and decision can be formed. It is possible to deceive oneself about what one really does intend, so one must be very careful and searching and honest in dealing with what one does and does not intend: what they have and have not decided to do. The fact is that people engaged with the use of pornography have decided to be there and have not decided not to be there. But "will power" alone will not solve the problem. The Vision must be right and appropriate Means will have to be employed to extricate oneself from pornographic use.
Now among the primary Means to deliverance is taking care to see pornography in all of its dimensions for what it really is. For many people, just to see the terrible degradation of others and oneself involved in pornography will strongly bolster their will to have no involvement with it. This is important. It is an application of the general truth that temptation of all kinds is defeated by "broadening the view" and looking at the solicitation in the larger context of life and of God. Desire overpowers the will primarily by obsessing the mind. What many think they experience as inevitability depends entirely upon their failure to see things as they really are. Will (human "spirit’) in its very nature seeks alternatives and the best of alternatives. But when the person has conceded desire the right to rule, desire blinds the mind and appears to give the will no alternatives. (I have got to have that donut, see that picture, etc.) But other Means must be employed in most cases. Two of the most useful are: openness to others and resolute avoidance of situations in which pornography can be indulged. As for openness, this may involve confession (to appropriate persons in appropriate ways), sharing with others in the same difficulty, a "buddy" (accountability) system with a small group of others (not all necessarily in the same difficulty) that allows you to meet and discuss regularly and to call on others for prayer and support in the hard times. Another measure that can be taken here is to kneel down publicly and pray out loud for deliverance from your temptation. Perhaps "in church." (St. Benedict threw himself into a brier patch upon the occasion of salacious thoughts, and it seems to have done wonders for him.) Now at this point one might say: Are you serious? My answer would be: Are you? With respect to "resolute avoidance," make sure that pornography is not within your reach. Get rid of it, and when tempted to replace it resort to the helps mentioned in the previous paragraph. Someone will say: "I just can’t do that." But anyone who says that has not decided to break the involvement or still has the poisonous vision or probably both. You cannot do the work at the "Means" level that must be done at the "Vision" and the "Intention" level. And if you do not do the prior works, Means will certainly fail to help you. Of course you can get rid of pornography, and you can avoid replacing it. It’s not like fighting gravity. You are in a process of breaking habits that possess all dimensions of your being: will, thought, feeling, social context and soul. It will impose some serious difficulties. But you can do it, and you will be aided if you are practicing a sensible schedule of spiritual disciplines—solitude, silence, study, fasting, worship, etc.—that are not focused upon the avoidance of pornography, but upon the healthy fulfillment of your life under God in the dramatic goodness of God’s world with others you love and serve. Pornography involvement is a sure indicator of the impoverishment of life. (Remember Philippians 4:8.) Jesus promised that "whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst; but the water that I shall give him shall become a well of water springing up to eternal life." (John 4:14; cp. 6:35) By "thirst" I believe he refers to unsatisfied desire and its ravages upon people, such as the poor woman by the well to whom he spoke. With reference to pornography or other enslaving fascinations, we are not talking about repressing desire or denying its reality. We are talking here about not having the desire. The person who would change must desire to not have the desires they now have, and be willing to do the things on the VIM pattern that will eliminate the desire or render it of no influence. Although there may well be cases where medical treatment, specialized counseling, or deliverance ministries are required, most people involved with the use of pornography have not come to the place where they desire not to desire it. For whatever reasons, they think it is too important to them and that they would be "missing out" if they did not have the desire for it. That concession traps them into continued use. Anyone who follows the path of VIM outlined above will receive Divine and other assistance to step out of involvement with pornography. What that means is that when something like the occasion to indulge in pornography presents itself to them, their first thought will be: Why would anyone want to be involved with that? What we have said here in relation to pornography can be generalized, with appropriate modifications, to apply to all issues of spiritual transformation into Christlikeness, both negative and positive. The field of Christian Spiritual Formation is an area of reality that lends itself to knowledge and to practice governed by knowledge. One certainly understands this from reading the Bible, and especially passages such as Colossians 3 and II Peter 1:2-11. That field is a field of play for grace, the actions of the Holy Spirit, and all of the instrumentalities of the Kingdom of God. But it also requires well-directed effort on the part of human beings. "Add to your faith virtue, and to your virtue knowledge…" (II Peter 1:5) |
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